It's hard to imagine certain people in your life not being there anymore. This morning I was awoken by a phone call from my mother. My first thought was if she realized what time she was calling me...and I just wanted to sleep. "Ben Alesbrook died last night in car accident..." As I hang up the phone, I fall apart. I've been exposed to people passing away, I've lost both my grandmothers, both grandfathers and two uncles, but maybe I was too young or I wasn't close enough to them to really feel the loss that I felt when I heard Ben died.