So I tried to get some feedback out of the folks and Nicole.  Never the less, I am still absolutely confused and I think the more I talked about the more I became lost.  I dunno how else to explain it though... If everyone perceives the world based on their own reality, who says what is real.  Now, that's not really what I am concerned about, doesn't phase me one way or the other...but I want to know who I am.  Not on the level of what's my name or what's my favorite color...but...well I guess you could say spiritually...I dunno...who am I?  Do you see who I am? Does he see who I am? Do I see who I am?  If everyone sees different, who is right?  Maybe, the "true reality" is never perceived by us and that is who I am.  The "true" me is an abstract concept that is lost in translation.  But there has to be someway I can dig through the crap and see that true me.  I dunno...sigh.